- I was first chair in band for many years with minimal practice (that means #1 in your instrument's section for those of you who weren't band nerds)
- I got the lead in the school musical my senior year (man, I'm really starting to sound like a nerd)
- I got a 36 in English on my ACTs (and nerdier still...)
- I applied to one college and got in, early admission, to a somewhat selective program
- I have long procrastinated writing assignments until the last minute, and inevitably been praised for my great work. (The nerd alarm is off the charts!)
I know it's not unusual, but I am obsessed with all of the processes and timing that go along with it. It is hard for me to come to terms with the fact that I cannot control something and that there is some work involved in this. I'm trying to let go a little and maybe I will over time, but I think part of it is just who I am.
My mom has pointed out that I will be the total opposite of my sister when I am a parent. My sister is so laid back with my niece and just goes with the flow. I will be the control freak that is afraid to let anyone else care for my child and sanitizes and baby proofs everything.
So for now, I need to focus on some deep breathing and take the advice of the Beatles:
"Let it be, let it be
Let it be, let it be
There will be an answer, let it be..."